First Step Forward


Ever since I sent that poem in to be judged, I’ve found it hard to write. I figured, what’s the point of writing poetry when I don’t even know if I’m good?? It was ridiculous to think that, but I’m only human. After admitting this to a good friend of mine and having a long chat about writing and insecurities, I’ve written two new poems. This sounds like great news right?? Wrong. Both my new poems are different. It’s still my writing style, however they are raw, and they have the signature of the dark corner of my mind written all over them. Typically, I weave the true meaning of my poems through red herrings. I switch back and forth between flowery, deceptive words and the bare truth. This allows my audience to interpret my poems the way they see fit. However, one of my new poems is overly blunt, and the other is far too difficult to understand. I guess my midlife crisis is starting early haha.

Anyway, I had to tell that anecdote in order to lead into the real purpose of this post. My first step forward since sending my poem in was not starting to write again. It was starting to finalize. For my birthday (my birthday was six months ago), a fellow poet friend of mine got me a really nice journal. This journal, she told me, was for my finished works. Immediately I responded by saying that no poem is ever finished. Of course being a writer herself she already knew that. However, she wanted me to write the poems that were as finished as they could be in this book. That was six months ago and finally, two minutes ago (seriously), I wrote my name in that book. At last I claimed that journal with a few unsteady ink strokes across a sturdy page. I still don’t have any poems written in there, but hey it’s a first step right??

-adviceateleven

Introducing….


A while back I did a few posts about branching out to new types of people. One was about gaming, one was about creativity, and one was about being a smart Alec. That was in 2013, and since then I’ve changed a lot. So I decided to talk to you guys about myself. Ugh, let me begin by telling you that I absolutely hate talking about myself. I’m awful at it, but I will try for you guys. Let’s start at the very beginning (a very good place to start). The first thing you need to know about me is that I’m a girl (in case there was any confusion there). I’m not going to disclose my appearance to you all, but I will tell you that my favorite physical feature is my green eyes. Okay, next thing is that I’m sixteen years old (that means this blog is 5 years old!!). I love to read a write (duh), but I also love to sing, snowmobile, and hike. Next need to know thing is that I’m a nerd. No, I don’t mean that I put on fake glasses, where a schoolgirl outfit, and pretend to pay videogames. I mean that I’m literally a nerd as in I excel in school, and I love learning. I’m rarely found without a book, I use words that I end up having to explain to my friends, and if someone wants to know what we should leave as a tip I will actually calculate it with proper significant figures. Also, I play Magic the Gathering (monoblack deck :p )……. Yep definitely a nerd tried and true. When I’m not nerding out (or sometimes simultaneously) I listen to music. I’m absolutely enchanted by music. I honestly can’t explain how or why, but it’s true haha. Moving on to some deeper things, my parents are divorced. I live with my mom and go to my dad’s every other weekend. It’s not easy being a Child of Divorce, but it’s my life. Alrighty, to delve deeper, I’m an INFJ (Introverted, iNtuitive, Feeling, Judging), and I will leave a link at the bottom of this post to lead you to a website that perfectly explains that. To go a tad more superficial, I volunteer a lot for several places. And I do believe that I have run out of things to say about myself. Anyway, I did this just because I gained more followers recently and I doubt that they would like to go through every single post ever attempting to find out more about the author of adviceateleven. If any of you want to know more about me just leave your question in the form of a comment on this post, and if you have a suggestion for my next post please leave a comment. That’s all for now folks.

http://www.personalitypage.com/INFJ.html

-adviceateleven

Putting Myself Out There


So I’m doing just as the title states. I’m going to put myself out there. I’m going to do this by applying to the Young Writer’s Conference. I’m not going to say where that is, but it’s at a college. What is it?? It’s a three day conference for young writers, hence the name haha. Basically there will be a ton of very accomplished writers there who are just dying to share their wealth of knowledge and advice with youngsters like myself. There will also be things like open mics, poetry slams, short story readings, and so on. I would stay in a dorm and attend seminars and workshops on poetry. However, and this is the whole putting myself out there part, I’m only applying to go. I had to send in an original poem of mine for them to judge and decide whether or not I can attend this event. This is a huge step for me. The last time that anyone was judging my poetry was two years ago at my last poetry slam. since then I’ve written a ton more poems, and I’ve changed my style quite a bit. I’m so nervous for this, and I’ve been going back and forth as to whether or not I should even apply, nevertheless, today my application was sent out. The last day that they except applications is February 17 (hence my milestone entitled Deadline), so I won’t know for quite a while if I got in or not. Just thinking about it makes me sick to my stomach.

When no one is there for me, poetry is. My notebook readily soaks up my tears, and it never minds if I never end up writing anything. I’ve sat there, pen in hand and static on the paper, hunched over my journal just letting the tears cascade over the contours of my face and onto the pale pages. I’ve heard the small noise of my own raindrops hitting the paper and blurring the azure lines that embrace me. In this fragile state my mind fills with white noise, but my diary never minds that no words stain the pages after I’m done. And when the hum clears, and the poetry pushes its way out of me, my notebook doesn’t complain when I press to hard, or my penmanship gets too sloppy. Poetry has always comforted me. It’s ironic how I can’t find the words to accurately describe how writing heals me.

So I hope that shows you just how important this whole thing is to me. This could change something, this could change me. I have an opportunity and for once, I refuse to let this one slip through my fingers. This time I’m going to do everything in my power to capture this opportunity. The only thing is that I’ve already done that. I’ve already given my 110% When I was editing my poem, when I was practicing my poem, when I still had that application in my hands there was something that I could do. That was me taking every chance I could and pouring myself into my work, but now there’s nothing I can do. I’ve done all that I can do and now it’s up to fate whether or not I’m accepted. That’s why I’m nervous. When it was still my turn to do all that I could I was fine because it was still up to me. Now, however, I’ve given up the reigns to fate. All I can do now is wait. So wish my luck, and I wish you all the best if luck as well.

-adviceateleven

Advice at Sixteen


As some of my long term followers know, I started this blog when I was eleven. Hence the name Advice at Eleven. Well years have passed and I’m sixteen now. My birthday isn’t today  it was actually in October, but I just realized that I never made a post for it, and I usually do. So what’s different now that I’m sixteen?? For one, I have my driving permit. Secondly, college has become really real. I’m a junior, and when I go to college I’ll be 17. That’s just a year. It’s crazy. Enough about me being sixteen though, let’s talk about eleven year old me.

I’ve never actually told you guys about how this blog really came to be. Yes I told you why I made it, but what gave me the idea?? Well, my brother had a blog (he’s 14 years older than me) and he is an incredible writer. I mean he would take something as simple as what he ate for dinner and create a beautiful post about it that would relate to the world and it is just amazing. Well fast forward to now, he no longer updates his blog because he has two kids. Anyway, I wanted to be like him. Also, I was in tha mall food court when I came up with the name Adviceateleven. I came up wit this name because I had wanted a blog for a while and I didn’t know what I’d write about. However, that day, sitting in the food court eating Chinese food with my mom, I was pissed. I don’t remember exactly what it was but my mom was telling me a story about how some stupid person did something stupid. I must have felt pretty passionate about the issue because I sat there for an hour and just spewed out my opinion to my mom. I gave advice (that the stupid person would never hear granted) and I related the issue to my life and it was just amazing. I didn’t know that I had that in me. Next I decided that an eleven year old knew more about giving advice than that stupid person, so I came up with avdiceateleven.

Well, that is the birth story of my blog. I hope that you enjoyed it, and Happy Birthday Adviceateleven

-adviceateleven 🙂

Honestly


Okay, so I’ve started this post over and over and I kept trying to write as though there was nothing on my mind. No matter how I started this post, it just didn’t seem real and honest. So guys I’m going to be honest because there are a lot of thing I’m not honest about on here. For instance, names, my name isn’t Ivory like it says in my WordPress profile, and Luke’s name isn’t Luke. I censor names so that I can protect identities, but by doing so I’m lying about those names. I’d never make up anything about my life though, all the stories I tell you are true, I only censor names. However, occasionally I leave out details (not on purpose) I just forget that you guys don’t actually know me. So right now, I’m going to be painfully honest (painful for me).

I moved. I took my life and ripped it out of the house that I lived in for years and years and I just placed it into a new apartment. The reason for this is that my mom and stepdad split up. They didn’t get a divorce my mom just decided that she needed time to herself. She told me that she was miserable, and she wouldn’t want to see me that miserable so she figured that I would want her to do whatever she needed to make herself happy again. It’s true, I would do anything to make anyone happy. I can’t stand to see people upset. So we moved. Not far, just across town. I still go to the same school, not much has changed except my address. However, one more thing that has changed is my mom and dad. Not my stepdad either, my actual dad. He constantly tries to get me to move in with him, and he constantly asks what my mom is doing and how everything is and what her friends are doing. He wants to catch her being a bad mother so that he can tell the family court judge. He hates that we moved, not because he’s concerned about me, but because he hates having to face the extra ten minutes of traffic it takes to get to where I live now. You may think that that’s ridiculous, that’s because it is. But it’s true, every time he comes to pick me up he mentions the awful traffic and how because my mom decided to move she should be the one dropping me off at his house. Next, how my mom has changed. She’s more spiritual. Every day she puts a new quote on our chalkboard, she has decided that she wants to go to church every Sunday, and she just has a different air about her. Nevertheless, she doesn’t seem any happier. I’m honestly pretty numb right now, I don’t know how to feel. I did write something, I’m not sure if I’d call it a poem, but I’m going to share it with you in the next paragraph.

I’m no construction worker, but I was proud of the last project that I built. I poured blood, sweat, and tears into this project for years and years. When something went wrong or broke I could always fix it and most everything had a place. But yesterday I disassembled my project and watched as it was precariously shoved into a Ryder van that drove off. I watched my life’s work drive down the road until I could no longer see the massive red and white vehicle that stole my everything. The entire process took about twenty minutes. My entire life was just taken apart and moved in 1,200 seconds. That’s no time at all. I had built a life and it was just taken down and transported somewhere new. Somewhere that has no memories seeping out of every pore. A place where I’d never fallen down the stairs and given my mom a heart attack. Somewhere that I haven’t spent hours and hours practicing songs and perfecting my art. A place where I have never cried nor laughed. A place that means nothing to me whatsoever. For now.

Okay, I hope you enjoyed that haha. If you’re going through something similar or anything at all and you want someone to talk to, comment that and I’ll be here for you. Alright guys I have spent two days writing this, I have to post it now. I hope that you appreciate my honesty or that you think something when you read this. That’s my goal, I want people to think and feel something when they read my writing. Before I get too deep again, bye.

-adviceateleven

COMPUTERS SUCK


I am still having technical issues 😥 I am sooooo sorry, I do love you guys but computers don’t love me. Anyways, Renne and Justin still aren’t together, but it’s a working process. Also, I’m in a new play!! I’m not going to say what play, however it is one that isn’t just kids and teens. This is a serious play with adults (I’m the youngest cast member!!) Today is my first rehearsal, wish me luck. I know two people in the play, a Russian boy (he’s here in America on a foreign exchange program) and my wifey (in another play I played a boy and she was my wife) other than that I don’t really know anyone :/ I’m nervous, but I’m sure I will be fine…. I hope. Alrighty, update on Luke time. He is still the cutest and best boyfriend ever, but DRAMA. A girl (my good friend Cassie) told him that he turns her on…….. yeah, needles to say she isn’t much of a good friend…. But, I don’t want to make things awkward, she doesn’t know that I know that she said that, and Luke told her that it made him feel uncomfortable and she shouldn’t say things like that because he’s in a committed relationship…… and I didn’t tell him to say that…… yepp perfect boyfriend ❤ Also, she apologized to him, and I think I’m just going to appease her for now, and see how things go. I may/may not regret this decision later, but such is life.

Okay, now I’ve just done what I normally do, given you an update, and then a problem and what I’m going to do to solve it (Hopefully you learn from my life) However, maybe some of you don’t care about Renne and Justin, or you absolutely love to hear about Luke. Basically, I want to know who you want to hear about. I can do a whole post about them and maybe you’ll like it haha. So go through my posts and find someone that you want a full, full, full update on. Maybe you want to know what happened to Connie, or Rebecca, or Trevor (ew). I could also introduce you to someone new, the possibilities are endless. In fact, there are two people I could introduce you to, you can choose from either Tara or Christian. So come on, pick someone, majority rules.

-adviceateleven ❤

My Apologies


Heyyyyy, I am so sorry. I haven’t been on in months, but I have an excuse. My laptop died. I’m on my stepdads computer and i’m being all secretive, I can not have my parents find this blog. Anywaysssss on to happier stuff. I’ve finally found friends to sit with at lunch, yepp I’m that cool sophomore sitting with two seniors and a junior 🙂 They’re hipsters in denial though, they refuse to sit in the upperclassmen lunch room, because it’s stupid and everyone sits there. So yay for me!! Me and the junior, Abbey, are trying to get the seniors, Renne and Justin, together. They are perfect together. End of story, it is meant to be. She’s had a crush on him for 4 years, and it’s obvious he likes her. Our goal is to get them together by prom. He absolutely refuses to go to prom……. wish me luck haha. Omigosh for Christmas I got him the best gift. I made something really awesome for Abbey, and for Renne I got her a quote book that she loves, but I had no clue what to get Justin. He loves Pink Floyd, and when he’s upset he draws a brick wall, and adds a brick every time. So I got my dad to draw a brick, and I gave him that. He, loved, it. Like a lot, I thought he might throw it out, but he actually put it in a folder, and hung it in his locker. The kid loves his brick xD 

Okay now for an update on my guy. Luke, is, the, best, boyfriend, ever. He is so cute, and he’s extremely considerate. My last boyfriend, Trevor, said a whole bunch of nice words to me. It felt like a dream when he told me such beautiful words, but actions speak louder than words. He was controlling, childish, and disrespectful. However, Luke doesn’t have flowery words, he looks me in the eyes, he holds my hand tight and takes as long s possible when he has to let go, Luke holds me when I cry, he tries to understand when I’m sad. He doesn’t realize how much he means to me, or how much his actions effect me, and sometimes he gets depressed, and then I get depressed. He’s different in the best way, and he makes me happy.

Alrighty, now it is time for me to take my leave. See you soon!!

First Day Worries and Woes


I’ve denied you guys this post for too long. However, it wasn’t all my fault, my internet was down so yeah. Also, I was in a desolate state. I was immensely depressed. (If you haven’t caught on yet, I’m trying to tell you that the first day sucked, on ice.) My hair looked great; as did my nails, makeup, and outfit. How I looked wasn’t the problem. I only have one class with Luke, only one class with Julie, and no classes with any of my other sisters. Plus I got the tougher English teacher. He’s going to make me a better writer, but I’m scared that in the process I’ll lose my deep love for writing. I don’t want that to happen. My other teachers aren’t the best either. My science teacher is “by the boo” as she says. However she’s too by the book, she’s all work no fun. My Spanish teacher babies us like we’re in fifth grade Spanish instead of eleventh (I skipped a grade in Spanish). My social studies teacher is okay, she isn’t great, she doesn’t suck. My math teacher is chill, I actually really like him, he’s a “go with the flow, just do the work and we’ll be friends” kind of guy. My chorus teacher is the same one I had last year, she’s eccentric, but I love her even if she does have an unnatural amount of energy in the morning. She’s also my music theory teacher (she has unnatural energy at the end of the day as well). 

This reminds me, I have homework for music theory that I’d like your guys help on. In your opinion, is music an art or a science?? Leave a comment or send me an email with your viewpoint.

Alright, now next order of business is my latest vocabulary update. You may have perceived how I’ve been scattering more advanced terms throughout the course of this post. Well, my English teacher said something that inquired my interest. “There’s always a better word,” how true!! Admit it, on how many occasions have you said a mediocre word when you could have, should have used a more appropriate word?? If you’re like me the answer is often. I wish to use superior words, therefore I will make it a point to do so. Let’s face it, the internet gives the choice to be whatever you want, why choose to be stupid?? 

-adviceateleven

Smart Alec


I’m continuing with the whole “branch out” thing and today I’m sharing a side of me that not many people know about, my Smart Alec side. I use a lot of sarcasm, unfortunately not many people get my sarcasm. My humor is always misunderstood. People just stare at me when I make a joke and then I awkwardly say, “it’s a joke…….”  The only one who really got my humor was my social studies teacher last year. He laughed at all my jokes, and I was the only one in class laughing my head off at all of his. He loved to joke about how he didn’t care about us kids, he would act mean and stern, and kids would get scared of him. As some kids were cowering like mice in the clutches of a cat, I was laughing hysterically.

I was his favorite student. He always gave us time to study right before a test and the first time he did this, I whipped out the flashcards I had prepared the night before. My flashcards did anything but blend in. My neon orange flash cards stood out like a sore thumb against the mass sea of white worksheet papers. The teacher walked around the class until he made it to my back row seat and stopped cold. “What do you have there??” He asked sternly. “Flashcards……” I replied, I had begun to think I was in trouble. Then he cleared his throat to get the attention of all the kids. All eyes were on me. I hated having the attention on me. I thought the worst, was I going to get in trouble?? For freaking flashcards?! Then the teacher spoke, “The only smart kid in this school, she made flashcards, Ivory here is using her brain and she’s going to get out of high school prepared for collage,” then he spoke just to me, “Good job.” Relief flooded through me. From there I couldn’t help the giggles that shook through me. Ever since that day, me and my flashcards were his favorite students. 

I’m no teachers pet, but from then on I used my best jokes on that teacher. He would try not to laugh, but I always knew he thought I was funny. Every class I looked forward to, it was my comic relief for the day. I would laugh and learn. I’m not a class clown either, but a Smart Alec?? Yeahhh I can be one of those haha. Alright, I’m out,

-adviceateleven

Creative Cat


By now you guys should know that my hobbies and talents tend to be on the creative side of things. I write, I sing, I dance, I act, these are all things that require a certain amount of creativity. While those are my main hobbies, I also like some other creative things. By that I mean that I really enjoy art. Art can come in many forms. The basics are paintings, drawings, sculptures, photography, and so on. However, dance is an art. Music and acting are also arts. I love the arts, but I’m not skilled with a paintbrush by any means. I can sketch a little (meaning that when I sketch people can tell what it’s supposed to be at best) and I really like working with oil pastels. The art I make though is no still life, nor portrait. I make representational art (abstract and surreal). When I draw or paint or sculpt, I prefer to make something that makes people think. I want people to wonder what the meaning behind my art is. (I also like drawing cartoon people for fun haha.)

You’re probably like, why the heck is she telling us this?? Well, the reason is that I’m trying to show you guys my other sides. I wanted to branch out, so my blog could touch all kinds of people. If you read my last post then you know all about my idea. The main point of me telling you about my artsy side is because I want you to know that if you need someone to share your artwork with, I’m your girl. I appreciate art, however I don’t appreciate obscene pictures. So if you’re going to send me art, make sure it’s pg. If you want to share you’re art with me (I hope you do!!) then email me at adviceateleven@gmail.com 

Even if you don’t want share art and you just want to talk, I’m cool with that. Email me!! Haha, okay this creative cat is out
-adviceateleven

Gamers Unite!!


Alrighty, it’s time my blog expands to involve more than just the people like me. I’m talking about the gamers. You’d probably never guess that I’m a gamer, well that would be because I’m not. However, Luke is strongly encouraging me to branch out and call to my inner gamer. Luke (my boyfriend for those of you who don’t know) is a hardcore gamer. He is such a gamer that he has a team of fellow gamers. He’s been trying to recruit me for ever, but I don’t have an Xbox so impossible. Well actually, my step brother just got an Xbox so I guess I somewhat have one now.

Anyway, his team is called ShadowTeam, and if you’re a serious gamer then you should check out his website and maybe join his team.

His team is only for Xbox (sorry those of you who play PlayStation) and I probably won’t explain it well, so I’ll just leave a link for his website towards the end of this post.

This whole branching out thing has got me thinking. My blog is very directed towards writers and shy people and well, the people like me. I don’t have much for gamers or jocks or preps. (Sorry that I’m using stereotypical labels, it’s just easiest.) I believe I need to do something for people who aren’t like me. I’ve toyed with the idea of having other writers, but honestly this is my blog and I wouldn’t feel comfortable having other people write here. I guess the only way for my blog to branch out, is for me to branch out. I should start writing things for other types of people, and to do so I need to start getting out of my comfort zone.

I don’t know, I’m starting to think this idea is stupid. Maybe I’ll try it, maybe I won’t. Let me know what you think. Should I try to widen my horizon?? Or should I just stick to what I know?? Who knows what I’ll do, I don’t even know.

Okay, sorry for those gamers who are just itching to check out Luke’s team website. I know I made you read through all of this, but you made it this far so you can wait a little longer. So, in the news of my latest poem (the haiku) it still needs a title people!! Look at my last post, read the poem, think of a title, tell me the title. Should I choose your title as the one I’ll be using, I will write a post all about you and your blog. I will even follow your blog. If you have no blog then I will just write a post about you and your awesomeness. 

Finally!! Relief for the poor gamers who have waited so very long. Here’s the link.
Oh crap and Luke isn’t his real name, it’s the name I give him on here to protect his and my identities. So if you call him Luke and he has no clue what you’re talking about…. sorry haha. Good luck,

http://icestripe2398.wix.com/shadowteam

-adviceateleven

Schedules


If your school loves you as much as mine loves me, you just got your schedule, and you just found out that you have no classes with any friends. All of my friends have fifth period lunch so it only makes sense that I have seventh period lunch. I might have gym and social studies with Luke, maybe. And I might have geometry with Brandon, but other than that, so far I’m all freaking alone. Lucky me. Well before I complain more I’ll talk about something else. (I’ll give advice about this situation when I’m less upset, I promise.)
So, i’m not entirely sure what I want to write about…… I just came on to vent, however maybe I’ll try writing a poem for you guys. I’m in a poem mood

I close my two eyes

To see all the unseen things

To forget the world

For some weird reason I wrote a haiku. It needs a title, any suggestions?? No idea is a bad idea, but not every idea is the right idea. So I’m open to all title suggestions.
I think I’ll turn it into a competition, if I chose your title name, then I will follow your blog and put a link to your blog in my next post. If I chose none of your titles well then that sucks. If your title wins and you don’t have a blog I’ll just tell everyone how awesome you are. Okay now that the rules are set, good luck!!
-adviceateleven

Normal Post


Because my last post wasn’t exactly “normal,” I’ll be doing another one for you guys. I would like to tell you that I have been working like a dog on the love poem I’ve promised, however, that would be a lie. I want to write this poem I’m just afraid it will be too mushy and cliche, or it will be the whole “love isn’t a bouquet of roses it’s the smiles we share” thing which is sooooooooooo over done that it makes me want to barf. 
Anyway, moving on. About my last post “Nine Days Until Death” I decided to do that in the whole news reporter style because my English teacher last year made us do a project in the style of a newspaper article. She pretended to be different people for us to interview and then we wrote about the big thing that had happened. Throughout the interviews she kept looking at me, and she thought hard about the questions I asked. By the end of the thing she said that I was the only kid who took this assignment seriously and that I should consider a career as an investigative reporter for a newspaper or news show. As you all know, I want to be teacher. It’s all I talk about and it’s even on my bucket list!! Still, I should be looking at other occupational opportunities. Of course, the post I made in the news style was just for kicks and giggles, but it was kind of fun to try and observe every angle of the story. From the teens and kids, to the adults, to the stores, and even the kids without Summer vacation. I tried to add every point of view. I suppose it’s good to keep an open mind about all of this. But I think I need to remember that I’m only 14 (well almost 15) and I have time. I don’t have to be so worried yet….. Then again when haven’t I been worried about my future?? Oh well. Join us next time here at wordpress’s awesome blog 
-adviceateleven

Nine Days Until Death


Breaking news: There are a total of nine standard days until Summer will be sacrificed for the sake of Education. They are raves and riots. Kids who have refused to do their summer homework are scrambling like eggs to complete their work. Children are getting in their last rebellious acts until they have to be good for Santa Claus.

Mas Chaos has erupted all over…….. well except for in China where summer vacation doesn’t exist……… Adult stress levels have skyrocketed from being 98% stressed to 99% as they fight for last minute deals on school supplies. This year the supply list have gotten longer and the stores have gotten richer. Does anyone know the difference between a graphing calculator and a scientific calculator?! I need both!! And what the heck makes a Texas Instrument calculator sooooo special?!

Tomorrow our top story will be the mourning of Summer Fun Vacation. Not even dead, yet we mourn the short lived life of Summer. A moment of silence please.
-adviceateleven

Liebster Award!!


Liebster Award Photo
Okay, okay, okay, I am freeeeaking out. I was nominated by Em (check out her blog, she was nominated too and she’s great) over at http://ateenagersmemoir.wordpress.com for a Liebster Award!! So, honestly I am still slightly confused about all this, but the rules are
The Liebster Award Rules:  
You must link back the person who nominated you.
You must answer the 10 Liebster questions given to you by the nominee before you.
You must pick 10 bloggers to be nominated for the award with under 200 followers
You must come up with 10 questions for your nominees to answer.
You must go to their blogs and notify your nominees.
My ten questions are:

1) What is your worst habit?

My worst habit would be my OCD. I have to do things evenly. If I eat one chip, I have to eat another. If I take three steps, I have to take one more to be even. I hate OCD so much, because it’s really just a bad habit that I need to break.

2) What is the one thing that you will never do again?

I will never jump off my shed onto the trampoline again….. Okay, I climbed on top of my shed and jumped off onto my trampoline and underneath my trampoline is metal bars and concrete….. Yeahhh not my best idea, but it was still fun for a minute.

3) What happened the last time you cried?

Last time I cried was because my nephew and niece had left to go back home. They live in Seattle I live in New York. I spent a week with them and I couldn’t bare it when they left. I curled up under my comforter with a pint of sea salt and caramel ice cream and cried in the dark.

4) If you could have one superpower for one day, what would it be and what would you do?

If I could have one super power, it would be the power to heal anyone who is sick. And all that day I would heal every sick and suffering person.

5) What is your most embarrassing moment?

Oh embarrassment, there are so may embarrassing moments in my life but at the top would be this one time in first grade. I was reading at my desk before class when all of a sudden I didn’t feel good. So I literally said to the kid next to me, “I don’t feel good, I should put this book away.” I put the book away, sat down, and proceeded to barf all over my desk. Then I nicely raised my hand and asked to go to the nurse. I had to carry  tiny trash can because I couldn’t stop puking….. poor first grade me.

6) If you could go back in time, what advice would you give to your younger self?

My blog is all about giving advice to others, but advice to myself is kind of difficult. I’m the person people go to when they need help, but I never help myself, I’m more of a suffer in silence (and then later post my issues on here haha) person.
I guess if I were to give a younger me advice, it would be to not let people walk over yourself….. myself….. whatever haha. I always let people take advantage of my niceness and I sort of wish I wouldn’t. Everyone thinks that I will just do everything to make their problems go away and I do because I let them walk all over me like I’m some kind of door mat.

7) What is the most scariest thing that has ever happened to you?

I am so easily frightened. People just say “boo” and I freak out. The scariest thing to happen to me though is when for a whole month when I was younger I would go to sleep all normal tucked in and then wake up with my entire bed flipped around. My pillows would be on the wrong side, the blanket flipped around, and even I was facing the wrong way. It was so weird and after a few weeks of this happening, it just stopped as suddenly as  it started.

8) What was happening the last time you were really nervous?

Last time I was nervous was when I was going to sleep away camp for the first time. I wasn’t nervous until I was signed in and at my cabin. I had got the last top bunk and all the other girls just stared at me, like full out stared.

9) What would people be surprised to learn about you?

People are always surprised when they find out I listen to Eminem, Sublime, and Kid Cudi. My cousin introduced me to these kinds of music during the summer at the wee hours of the morning. We would listen to these songs on repeat over and over. So when I hear the old Eminem, Sublime, and Kid Cudi, I think back to when I was little drunk on soda and cheese doodles, just chilling. Whenever people find out that though, their eyes pop out of their head and they say stuff like, “but you’re such a good girl, those songs have swearing and bad things in them.” It’s really funny to see their reactions.

10) What is your most favourite thing to do?

My favorite thing to do is write. When I’m alone in my room, blasting music at 2 am writing like my life depends on it, it’s the most bliss thing in the world. Writing is my release, my drug, and me all wrapped up together. It makes me feel important and like I have something worth putting down on paper for the world to see. Writing is the way I feel connected, when I write it’s like anything is possible, like infinity is possible. Nothing is too difficult to overcome, and I’m not alone. I feel connected to the past, present, and future as I write the skeletons in my closet and the golden light peeking through the windows in my mind.

I had way too much fun with that last question haha. Alight, now I have to nominate ten other bloggers. That is going to be hard. So first I’m going to write down my ten questions fir my nominees to answer.

1. If you could have dinner with one celebrity that has passed who would it be and why??

2. What’s the happiest moment in your life so far??

3. Why did you start blogging??

4. If there was a soundtrack to your life what five songs/artists would be on it and why??

5. What’s your dream job??

6. If you could drop everything right now and go anywhere in the world would you?? If yes, where would you go?? If no, why not??

7. Do you have any regrets?? If so, what do you regret??

8. Coke or Pepsi??

9. If you could live the life of any fictional character from a book, movie, or TV show, who would it be and why??

10. Are you superstitious?? (Ex. no walking under ladders, Friday the 13th, broken mirrors etc.) Why or why not??

Okay, now here are my nominees:
http://theryanberry.wordpress.com

http://jclu4ever22.wordpress.com

http://bessyontz.wordpress.com

http://thelifeofchen.wordpress.com

http://apoliticalstand.wordpress.com

http://tiffanygail.wordpress.com

http://livinghonestly13.wordpress.com

http://capitalkblog.wordpress.com

http://pineandpaper.wordpress.com

http://thesouthernsky.wordpress.com

These are the blogs I find worthy of nomination. There are so many others I wish I could have nominated, but I can only nominate 10. Good luck to all my fellow nominees and thank you Em for nominating me!! You are officially an awesome person.
-adviceateleven ❤

Love Poem


I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to write for my next poem and well, I’m thinking about doing a love poem. It can not be cliche though. It needs to be fresh and original, something new. Or maybe I’ll just forget the love poem…… I’m much better at depressing and inspirational poems. 
I also really need to continue writing my novel I am so behind. I keep saying that yet here I am, writing on my blog instead of in my novel. Eh, maybe I’ll write after breakfast, I’m hungry haha. It’s 10:10 and I haven’t gotten out of bed yet…. but I woke up at 7:00……. 
I also need to finish reading this book. It’s called Legend, and it is awesome. Speaking of books, I should recommend some to you guys. The Born at Midnight series is incredible. Also, I’ve been trying to read the House of Night series and it’s pretty good. 
Well, I need food xD okay byee.
-adviceateleven 

Sorry


I ended up going camping, it was all I expected it to be. But no sad news, I want to keep it positive. I really need to write a new poem. And I’m so behind in writing my novel……. wow I’m just so behind. Maybe when s***** starts I’ll get back into the swing of things. (s***** is school but during summer I consider that word a swear word haha). Anyways, I need new ideas for a poem, anyone got anything?? I’d love to hear your ideas. If you have read my earlier poems you should know my style. I don’t really do funny poems because I suck at it haha, I’ve never tried a love poem but I could, I’ve done plenty of depressing inspiring poems so I’m good at that. 
Anywayys, I suppose I should talk a bit about s*****. I’m entering tenth grade and I’m kind of nervous. First of all, I may cross paths with Trevor and lets just say that we aren’t friends…. Then there’s Autum, knowing my luck, we’ll be in every class together. I’m also nervous about AP prep. English, I’m so passionate about English stuff but what if I don’t get the teacher I had last year?? Everyone says that if you get Mrs. Develyn then you’re going to be okay, but if you get the other teacher then you have to just drop out…. Also, accelerated Spanish. Again, I’m passionate about Spanish but I’m going to be in a class of eleventh graders, sure I did fin with tenth graders last year but ehhh I’m still nervous and soooo shy. Alrighty, time for the positives as always. Learning!! I love learning haha, I hate the people who ruin classes by not caring though :/ . Also, friends!! I’ve missed my friend soooooo much. And I can get out of this house!! I miss getting dressed up for school each morning. 
Now, if any of you guys would like school advice (or any advice at all) you know what to do. You can email me at adviceateleven@gmail.com or you can leave a comment. I will try to write something new for you guys, I promise.

adviceateleven.

No Title


Sometimes life just sucks. At the moment my milestone thing says that I will be going camping tomorrow, well it’s wrong. I didn’t really want to go camping in the first place. DOn’t get me wrong here, I love camping, but honestly, my brothers would’ve been off riding there bikes the whole time, my dad and stepmum would’ve done their own thing, and then I’d be left all alone. (Like always). Well tomorrow I have an orthodontist appointment and Wednesday I have voice lessons. My dad made the ortho appointment so he admitted that it was his fault he forgot. However, my voice lessons have been scheduled for three months and I’ve only known about the camping trip for two weeks. My dad says that he has no way to get me to the voice lessons and I should just miss them. Lessons are $60, I can’t reschedule and no refunds. My dad thinks that he can just talk to my teacher and she will understand. However me and my mum have a contract with her and we both know that she does not need to be involved in this and that she will tell my father that we can not reschedule. My father is too freaking pig headed to either understand that I can’t go camping with him or to just leave the campground for two hours to drive and get me then drive back.
He’s not the greatest father, but to be honest my mother isn’t the greatest either. Sigh, it may be a dysfunctional family but I guess It’s my dysfunctional family. Well before I cry or something worse I have to stop thinking about this. I’ve already pulled out some of my hair….. Man sometimes I feel so broken, so messed up. I’m a healthy 14 year old girl with trichotillomania, a tremor in my right hand, chronic migranes, panic and anxiety attacks. Not to mention How often I’m depressed. I guess it could be a good thing that I’m so messed up, because of it I want to help people. I want to make sure people don’t end up like me, broken because of something that they can’t control.

I guess this post is going to be another one about depression. The last time I talked about depression (the post started out with the quote “Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go”)  I told you guys that I have trichotillomania, and while it’s a disease it’s also a form of self hurt. What I didn’t tell you is that pulling my hair out isn’t the only thing I’ve done. I’ve snapped rubber bands on my wrist until I bled, I gave myself friction burns that would last for days, I’ve starved myself just to feel like I was wasting away, I’ve even dehydrated myself just for the fun of it. Oh yeah and I’ve done my fair share of cutting. No one ever noticed when I did these things to myself. Eventually I told Luke, he helped me stop. Now there is a point to this story, I don’t want you guys to feel bad for me or anything, I just want you to have living, breathing proof that you can overcome anything. I’m still not ready to share what has made me do all those terrible things, but it doesn’t matter. I used to think I had reasons to do that. I thought that my life sucked enough that I had permission to hurt myself. No matter what you’re going through, it’s not okay nor does it help, to harm yourself. There is nothing that you could go through that would make it okay to hurt yourself. Honestly, once you start doing all those things the little things become “bad” enough to hurt yourself. Like at first maybe you say you’re only going to cut this one time because you were picked on today, but then you get picked on again, so you cut again. Eventually, you get so used to running back to the blade that little things seem like they are bad enough to cut over. But nothing is actually bad enough to self harm over. Basic moral of all this, is that self harm just isn’t worth it. There is no reason you should be dragging a knife across your wrist, or sticking your hand in the flames, or skipping meals, or “forgetting” to drink anything that day so you can feel dizzy. You get the point by now I hope, if not, message me. I set up an email for this thing (adviceateleven.gmail.com). And just a reminder, I love you guys
-adviceateleven ❤

Sleep Away Camp


Sleep away camp was……….. SO AWESOME!!!! Haha I had a lot of fun, I made so many friends and had tons of fun. The food was great (vegetarian options!!) the fellow campers were nice (new friends!!) and the counselors were awesome. The only thing I didn’t like was how much I missed Luke. It’s super dorky but, I thought about him all the time. It hurt to be away from him. Yeahhh I guess I’m a little clingy but whatever. 
I have not talked about music in forever, and if you’ve noticed my latest milestone, I’m going camping soon. So before I go away again, I’m gonna fill you in on what my playlist consists of at the moment. Lately I have been obsessed with Birdy. Some of my favorite songs from her are Shelter, Skinny Love, People Help the People, and 1901. Okay, so another artist that i think deserves mentioning is Elena Siegman. All you Xbox nerds know her, even if you don’t recognize the name. She sings many hidden songs in the Nazi Zombies maps in Call of Duty. (If somehow I messed the info up sorry, I’m not exactly an Xbox junkie). You might recognize some of her songs like, 115, The One, Beauty of Annihilation, and Lullaby of a Dead Man. I’ve been trying to learn to sing some of her songs because well it’s really nerdy but I would really want to sing a song for a popular video game. Not just any song though, a hidden song. Like to unlock the song you would have to do some crazy thing in the game that no one would expect unlocks a song. Besides Elena Siegman songs are like creepy and sexy at the same time, it’s awesome. Alright, I’ll only mention one more artist (I could go on forever when it comes to music) and because I’ve already talked about two female singers, I’ll talk about a male group. Three Days Grace, they rock. Haha sorry I’m not listing any songs.
Hmmm, so I really need to plan out what I’m going to  write before I start writing it…. that would be smart. Okay so because I cannot, for the life of me, think of anything else to say, I’m going to say goodbye (I may or may not post again before I go camping)
-adviceateleven

Camp


Alright guys, this is it. I’m going to sleep away camp and I won’t be able to blog for some time. I’ll be gone at camp for a week, then I come home for 2 days, (So maybe I’ll blog then) and lastly I’m going camping for a week with my dad…… yeah wish me luck. 

Okay so lately I’ve been going into chat rooms and mentioning my blog, people seem to like it so far. I really want to get the word out about this blog, it’s so important to me. I’ve gained a few followers and omigosh that’s so cool haha. (To all my followers you guys are like the best people on this planet) Yeah I sound a little desperate but haha who cares?? 

In other news (this is long overdue) I just wanted to announce that Luke and I are dating. He is my best friend and my boyfriend and I’m so lucky to have him. I never want to lose him even if we end up just being friends. (but I hope we always stay more than friends haha) 

Anyways, I gotta go, I love you guys!!!! Stay awesome,

-adviceateleven 

Sigh


Okay, I’ve already posted something today, but I’m extremely depressed right now, so I need something to distract me. I haven’t posted a poem in a while, so I guess that’s what I’ll do. This poem is a very rough draft, so please no hate, but any ideas and what not would be appreciated. the poem is called Soar.

Soar

I am a bird

Don’t cage me,

Clip my wings,

Cut my beak

So I can’t sing

Broken winged

I fight

For my life

For my right

To take flight

To one day join my flock

To stop the clock

Because I don’t have time

I don’t have freedom

I have wonder

My feathers black and dull

Are as beautiful as my chime

The tune I croon

Bittersweet and sorrowful

Cry till I smile

Sing till I drop

Wake and sleep

Sleep and wake

Until I just sleep

When my wing heals

And I find flight

No one can stop me

From facing judgement

Today

Tomorrow

What is time to me

But wasted

Wasted on you

Wasted on the meaningless beauty

That we praise

 Wasted on the silky oil

Consuming me

Whispering how

I can’t change

How I don’t fit

In the silver box

My friends worship

And my foes reside

Where I live I wake to water

Clear and pure

Gentle hands cleansing

My wounded heart

With its wobbling beat

Barely pumping

In its wake

The liquid crystal leaves me

The real me

Black veil pulled back

Camouflaged in color

Shattered in pieces

But breathing

Broken

But beautiful

Maybe its not today

Maybe I have time

Just look how I shine

In this moment

I am timeless

I’ll never go out of style

So I guess I’ll stay

But only for a while

I’ve got other places to be

Alright, that’s all for now. I hope you enjoyed this poem. Bye.

-adviceateleven

Stage Combat


Okayyy so as you may or may not know depending on whether or not you’ve read my older posts, I have been taking stage combat classes. Well, the classes are um greaaaat…… Okay it kinda sucks. The teacher is a creep. It’s a girl but it took me two days to figure out that she’s a girl….. The kids well, there are four girls, including me, and then the rest are guys. Hyperactive, 12 year old boys. Yeah, hyper boys + fighting = chaos. However, every cloud has a silver lining and the four girls got together and we’re doing a skit. James Bond & Chuck Norris vs. two sexy villains w/ two hostages & idiot  guard. Yep our skit is the best. It started with just me and this girl Rebecca, but then Alexandra and Gianna came up with the idea to do a tag team fight scene. Alexandra is Bond, Gianna is Norris, and Rebecca and I are the sexy villains. That was all, it was just going to be us four, however, why would Norris and Bond team up just to randomly fight two girls?? So we included one of the other counselors (who happens to be extremely cute, bonus) as our hostage. So, after practicing a lot, we were finished, however, this kid named Justin was looking all sad. So me being me had to go see what was wrong. Turns out Justin’s partner Aaron decided not to do a skit. Of course me being me hated to see this because its happened to me. So I told him to be in our skit as another hostage. After a little adjusting our skit was great, but in walks Aaron and he mentions how awesome our skit is and how he doesn’t have a partner….. Of course me being me finds a small part for him. That’s how my two person fight scene became a five person all out battle scene.

The scene begins with Rebecca and I interrogating the hostages. After slapping them around we hear a knock on the door. I ask who’s there and Bond replies, “Dominos.” I ask if Rebecca ordered pizza but she hasn’t. Next Bond asks, “who ordered the pepperoni,” and Norris says, “with two slices of justice.” Norris kicks through the wall and begins to fight Rebecca while I take on Bond. I get knocked down and so does Norris. Then Rebecca goes after Bond while I get up and take on Norris. Rebecca and I both lose. Norris and Bond free the hostages only for one to steal Bond’s suitcase and hit him with it. The other hostage laughs, but Bond knocks him down. Lastly the two heroes go after the hostage with the briefcase.

I didn’t go into detail all the fight moves, but it looks awesome. Okay, well I really have to go, my mum’s a little pissed off at the moment.

-adviceateleven

Classes, Take 2


Okayyy so for those who have read some of my earliest posts, you may remember when I took classes during the summer a few years ago. I took Asian fashion classes and short story classes. Well, now I’m going back again. This time I’m taking stage combat classes!! For you who don’t know, I love acting. Sometimes in plays and movies you see two characters fight. That’s what stage combat is. It’s hitting, kicking, pinching, choking, pulling hair, stabbing, and oh so much more without actually hurting the person. Usually you don’t even touch the person. I’ve taken stage combat classes before; however these classes were shorter and taught by my middle school drama teacher. (She also happened to be my Spanish teacher.)  The classes I’m taking are at a collage and I can not wait. It’s going to be so fun…….. I hope. 

Of course there are the jitters and butterflies. The other kids won’t like me, I’ll actually hit someone, I’ll get made fun of, I’ll get hit. Yepp that’s just a few of the fun thoughts flying around in my head. My trick to overcome some of these thoughts, I don’t be me. It sounds weird but I’m an actress. So I just act like someone confident, or flirty or cunning. I can be whoever I want. Now there’s always a chance that someone I know will be there. In that case I be my shy, mousey self. However, I have a plan B. I wear clothes that make me feel comfortable and some-what confident. I also do my hair and makeup in ways that I like a lot. 
I should tell you guys to be yourself. I should say that if you be 100% yourself, you won’t get made fun of. But I’m a teen, and I’ve been bullied for most of my life, so I know that sometimes, being yourself doesn’t work all that great. Some people don’t care if they be themself and people don’t like them. I’m so jealous of the people who don’t care. However, I do care, so I fake confidence. 

Some people don’t agree with the whole fake confidence thing, but it works for me so. Anywayssss, I don’t feel like writing anymore soooooo,

-adviceateleven 

Future


Okay so I’ve been thinking about the future a lot lately. Specifically I’ve been doing a great deal of research on collage. Collage looks scary, extremely scary. I even took this quiz on what collage would be best for me. (I’ll post a link for the quiz at the bottom of this post) The top three collages for me are 1.) University of Oregon 2.) University of California- Berkeley 3.) University of California- Los Angeles. I’ve been looking at the websites for those collages and I honestly think Berkeley is the best for me. I’m so serious about looking for collage that I told my mum about the quiz and my results. She told me that Berkeley sounds like a perfect match for me. However, we don’t live in California, and California residents pay a significantly less amount of tuition. My mum was even talking about moving me to California 6 months before graduation so we can get the discount. So now you can kinda see why I’m scared about collage. I mean moving?? I don’t want to move before I graduate. Well, don’t let my story scare you. Go to your school counselor for help with collage, that’s their job. From now on, I’m going let my counselor help me. And just a piece of advice, do not look at collage websites alone. Collage websites make me dizzy. Well, that’s about all I wanted to say for now until next time,
-adviceateleven
http://www.selectsmart.com/bestcollege/

New Stuff


Okay, I’m going to put myself out there. Close my eyes and really take a leap of faith. What I’m going to do could either be steroids to my confidence or be another wrecking ball hurtling towards the torn and shredded self esteem left in me. Alright so I’m being a wee bit melo-dramatic. All I’m really going to do is add tags to my posts. I hope that by adding tags, my blog posts will pop up on like search engines and what not. You know you type in, tags, and there this post is.

Anyways, I’m in a good mood. It may be late at night, I may be surrounded by crumpled and crushed kleenex due to my allergies to who knows what, and yeah I may have just been bawling my eyes out (no doubt I’ll be paying for that when I wake up with red, puffy eyes). However I have not let the current circumstances put a damper on my mood. Yup, it’s all sunshine, unicorns, and pretty music. (Plus I still got my sense of humor!!) So due to my blissful temperament I’m going to update you guys on the good in my life at the moment.

So, the sunshine I would say is this song I’ve been listening to. It also happeneds to be the cause of my uncontrollable crying. This song is pretty old, but regardless of its age I intend to learn how to sing this song, and I have been practicing for days. Lovely by Sara Haze is this song that I am head over heels for. Its meaning is simply put yet beautifully said with a cascading voice and soft piano tones. I’m absolutely enchanted by this song.

Next, the unicorns. Which would also be yet another reason for my tears. I’m starting some summer acting classes at a collage close by. I’m so excited, yet it means I will have to give up time well spent with my friends. Also, the next week I’m going to a sleep away camp. No phone, computer, or friends.

Ah the pretty music (I guess this one should be the song but whatever, it’s my blog I do what I want haha). The pretty music would have to be Luke. He makes me happy and he happens to be the reason the bawling stopped. Who would have thought one smile he put on my face could turn around my night completely?? I sure didn’t. I don’t know how he does it, he makes my heart feel like it’s having helium pumped into it and any second my body will join my head in the clouds. Of course it isn’t always picnics on cloud nine. Every once in a blue moon we disagree, and we get depressed, and I fear he will realize that there’s no way in this universe I will ever be good enough for him. How he puts up with me, is a mystery I’ll probably never solve, and one I don’t think I want to solve.

Dang, do I sound like a lovesick puppy or what???????? Actually can I be a lovesick kitten?? I think they’re cuter haha. (I’m kinda hoping he doesn’t read this post…. I sound so girly and eh needy, ehhhh my good mood’s gone I’m seriously considering deleting this entire post and just crying again. No, I said I would put myself out there, well world here I am) Okay so now that my pep talk to myself is over I will get to the meaning of this post. Basically there’s so much freaking bad in this world of ours. Crying, allergies, divorce, poverty, starvation, death. But man, just look at the wondrous good as well. Music, education, a smile when it seems as though you’ll never experience anything other than a frown ever again. Yeah, there’s a heck of a lot of bad, but the good is worth sticking around for, trust me.

-adviceateleven ❤